Monday, July 27, 2009
[[blahh]]
cry and cry, and when the tears have stopped,
let's keep a smile on our faces
I want to cry, let it out.
But I really can't.
I havent cried at all, even when my parents left.
Everyone seemed to have cried. I just teared abit. I didnt want to cry infront of others.
I didnt even cry at the airport when my family came to say goodbye. When I said goodbye to my elder brother, I was surprised no tears fell.
I cried once when I was just thinking and emoing back in one of the temp apartments.
Mum was there for me till 1am.
I didnt cry since.
I want my brain to REGISTER that I'm in uni and in aussie.
I have to study. I have to survive and live on my own.
Maybe I'm scared that I would be too afraid to move on when everything sets into my brain. So scared, my tears won't stop coming?
I'm scared of growing up.
I'm scared of so many things I may not want to admit out loud.
To get through day by day, my brain seems to be lying to myself. It's just a "test" to me, which is so tiring. I hate that feeling
I'm such a pathetic person, sometimes I laugh at myself.
ha.
ha.
ha.
Piko blogged at 8:33 PM
